From The Chicken Coop – May 4, 2020

May 4, 2020

Dear Diary,

Something strange has happened in the chicken coop. We have had a meeting. Here is what we have figured out:

Today, Olive went in for her special time at the usual hour. We were all waiting for her to come out so that we could go in for our special time. There are plenty of boxes, but we all like the good one, you know. Finally, Happy Feet became impatient and marched in with reckless abandon, resolved to use an inferior (but still molded nicely to a chicken butt) box.

And then, SHE didn’t come back out. So, that was two of the favorite nesting boxes that would be unavailable to the rest of us. The other Olive, Chicken George, Mama, and I decided that this was not fair. Why did they get to sit all day in the good nesting boxes while we wait around? Who wants to use a nesting box that hasn’t been molded and made cozy? All the other nesting boxes were just a mess of hay and shavings and the rest of us would not stand for it!

We marched in and found…..nothing! Olive and Happy Feet were not having there special time. There were no eggs – no evidence that anyone had been there. Once we all got in there, all thoughts of laying eggs and nesting boxes were forgotten.

Right there, in front of our eyes, there was a hole in the side of the coop! Olive and Happy Feet must have been eaten.

We had another meeting. Chicken George suggested that whatever made that hole was sure to eat the rest of us too! She left the meeting to go pace under the basket to get the humans attention. We may need their help.

The other Olive suggested that Mama peek out the hole to see what was going on. I can not repeat what Mama said, but she did not peek. We decided it would be safer to leave the coop and join Chicken George in trying to get the humans attention.

We clucked our loudest. Walked, no – RAN – our fastest under the basket, and stood by the door. Humans must be idiots because even a turkey would have noticed that we needed help. But, the humans did not come. Clearly, they are useless. We were on our own. In disbelief, and two chickens short, we went back inside the coop to figure out what to do next.

As we headed into the coop, a familiar sound came from the hole in the wall. It sounded familiar. I called out.

“Bac – Kawk!”

And she responded, “Bec, bec, bec kawk!”.

Could it be?

This time Mama called,”Bawk, bec, bec beckawk!”

“Backawk!”, hollered back the voice excitedly.

Happy Feet!

We knew it was okay to go out. What we found on the other side of that hole was truly amazing! It was soft and light – exactly the perfect thing to roll around in and throw all over our bodies. We rolled, clucked, and rolled and clucked some more. At some point Chicken George figured out that it was safe and joined us. (Chicken George is always the last to the party).

We had an amazing day, no thanks to the humans!

Sorry humans, no eggs today. We were busy.


Welcome to The Idiot Chicken!

Thanks for joining us on what we hope will be an exciting journey! Despite the name, we plan to write about more than just chickens. Although, we agree chickens are clucking awesome!

Along with chickens, we also garden and raise bees on our half acre plot of land. If you did a double take when reading how small our parcel of land is- we agree! We have some plans in the works to potentially expand (more on that later), but for now we are doing the best we can with what we have.

In case you are thinking, “Well, Idiot Chicken, I can’t get more land. How the cluck can I grow food for my family?”.

Don’t worry. We know it is an affectionate term.

That is exactly what we hope to talk about here. Even if we can get our hands on more land, our open space will likely be limited for the foreseeable future. We are hoping to share information about what we have learned about yardsteading (growing as much food as you can in a small area). We want to take you with us as we learn even more!

This year (2020), we hope to talk about gardening and chicken keeping in small spaces, foraging, raising meat animals, and anything else we can think of related to yardsteading!

Please reach out to let us know if there is something you would like to read about.

Have a clucking awesome day!

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