From the Chicken Coop

Chicken Diaries

April 28, 2020

Dear Diary,


There is a problem in the coop, and it must be solved! The Olives have been complaining about it for some time now. At this point, I think it has happened to each of us at least once.

Here is what’s happening. At times throughout the day, each of the ladies visit the coop for a very special purpose. We like quiet. We like security. We like PRIVACY. Bacawk!

Usually it’s wonderful. It is cozy and warm in there, and sometimes yummy herbs are there to munch on while we do our special thing. It is relaxing and we love it.

The problem? The idiot humans.

They have created a secret opening in the coop for the purpose of stealing our eggs. That’s not the problem – we don’t care about that. Not one of us is interested in sitting on those things, anyway. Not. One. So take them! Take all the eggs!

All we ask, PLEASE (beck, beck, bacawk!) is that those idiot humans wait until we are done laying the eggs.

Two of the Olives and Chicken George all reported during our last meeting that they were rudely interrupted during their special time. Not only did the idiots open the trap door, letting in cold air, but Chicken George reports that one of them sat there with the door open making annoying noises at her for such an extended period that she had to leave! Cluck, cluck, cluck.

How rude!

We have discussed calling a meeting with the humans. This means that we will have to step up our efforts to communicate with them. Happy Feet and Mama have been assigned the task of coming up with new ideas. So far, our efforts to communicate with the idiot humans have been fruitless.

The other Olives think that the idiot humans are not capable of communication. The rest of us are undecided. Admittedly, it does not look promising.

I remain hopeful. We simply can not continue on like this.


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